Last week, I shared the four pillars of Emotional Intelligence, and today, I will dive deeper into Self-Awareness. 

  1. Self-Awareness: Understand yourself 
  2. Self-Management/Self-control: Manage your emotions 
  3. Social Awareness: Understand others
  4. Relationship Awareness: Managing relationships with others 

So what does it mean to be self-aware? The traits of someone who is self-aware might be: 


Be mindful not to confuse this with arrogance. Here’s a bit more info about how these two often confused traits differ: 

  • Confident people are open to external opinions and ideas. They are secure in themselves, so they can receive input from others. 

Arrogant people believe they know it all and refuse to accept help. They have an exaggerated sense of their abilities, so they cannot see that they would benefit from the advice of others. If you want to learn more, check out The Confidence Gap. 

Introspective self-awareness

Do you know what triggers you? For example, do you know how your face looks when you get bad news or hear something that you disagree with? If you don’t know, ask your partner, best friend, etc.

A self-deprecating sense of humor

This isn’t always applicable, but sometimes it is. So be mindful of this one. It can sometimes become something used to hide or shield the reality of your feelings. 

Understanding your values 

Understanding your values and boundaries in all aspects of your life is one key to becoming more self-aware.

If you want to work on self-awareness, here are a few tips that can be helpful:

  • Create time and space for yourself. Use that to check-in with yourself. How are you feeling? What is weighing on you? 
  • Practice mindfulness. Be present in the moment and pay attention to your internal thoughts and feelings. 
  • Journal about your self-awareness. This can help make reflection easier. 

As you go into the week, think about the wake you leave behind in every conversation you have. 

Life is good. 

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